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Beach quotes funny

-A policeman stopped me and told me “Papers”. So I said “Scissors, I win!” and he left.

-Be the person you were lazy to be yesterday.

-Jokes about elephants are not good. Because they are irrelevant.

-The first time I sang in church, two hundred people changed their religion.

-Don’t think that you are an ugly person, think that you are a beautiful monkey.

-If the mountain comes towards you, run, because it is collapsing.

-I thought about losing weight once weight , but I don’t like losing .

-I have had a very tired day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.

-I have to go to the eye doctor, but I never see the moment.

funny quotes couple

-Some things are better left unsaid. But I’ll get drunk and say them anyway.

-The best part of going to work is coming home at the end of the day.

-You never realize what you have until it goes away. Toilet paper is a good example.

-My neighbors listen to good music. Like it or not.

-I love my job, only when I’m on vacation.

-Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring and then I go back to being myself.

– Hypochondria is the only disease that I do not have.

-When one door closes, another door must open, but if it does not, then enter through the window.

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